how can life means a lot to an ordinary guy like me?

let me remind you this before you starting read too far and yet you found this blog just like another rubbish.startin' here, i'm just a simple guy.real simple guy. working for almost 12 hours per day. texting my girl, snooker, footballs, riding, photographing, bla,bla,bla just like another teens. but that was before. not after something happen to me. it's all started when i try to run from police officer, maybe 2 years ago. they are chasing after my suspicious act in front of 'em. actually that night, i'm not doing any crime. i'm just afraid. so i run. i run with all my heart. and i still can't beat their speed. then after a few minutes ago, they managed to get me handcuffed.busted. after that, they start to beat me like i'm a piece of junks to 'em. one of them beat me using a cutter that we used to cut solid steel. and i still can feel the pain till today. after they're totally satisfied with what they had done to me, then they sent me to poice station. there, i was asked to many question. it's like a non stopping bullet. all of them keep repeating the same question and if i can't answer it correctfully, i'm done. yeah i'm done. after a few days later, i was sent to the jail. there, i learn how cruel you are at your place, but once you step in the prison, u will never feel the same. i cried and my tears never stop dropping. everyday in jail makes me wanna commit a suicide. but i still have faith on me. so i started to perform a complete 5 times/day solah. after solah, usually i will start crying. crying all over again like a small baby begging for a milk. there i learn how to appreciate all the things that ALLAH had given to me. i hold the bars everyday wishing that i was home at the time. what a regret.